320: Build Trusted Authority By Speaking From Stages with Con Koutsikas

If you want to build your authority and position yourself as the trusted thought leader people turn to, speaking from stages is one of the best ways to achieve your goal. In this episode of the Influence By Design podcast, we’ll discover how to build trusted authority by speaking from stages with Con Koutsikas.

Con is a public speaking and communications expert, and host of his podcast, ‘A Cuppa with The Con Versationalist.’ He is passionate about helping businesses and individuals create deeper relationships and greater success through better speaking and communication skills.

Coaches, course creators, and experts utilise speaking to scale their businesses. It’s an awesome platform that allows one to build authority, audience, and influence. However, the journey to becoming a successful speaker is not an easy one. It’s filled with fear and lots of preparations.

If you want to know more about how to be an authoritative speaker and the essentials needed to achieve speaking success, be sure to listen to the episode.

WHAT YOU’LL DISCOVER IN THIS EPISODE:

Con’s windy journey into public speaking (02:21)
Start to reframe the fear (07:09)
Preparing to show up and be a great speaker (11:53)
Venue and environment are essential (16:52)
Preparing for the worst and setting a plan in place (17:36)
Visualization into speaking practice (18:31)
Con’s take on practicing your talk (20:50)
Advice on giving a keynote (22:35)
Relatability and the power of the pause (24:14)
Speaking on different platforms (26:18)
The best way to start public speaking (30:08)

RESOURCES MENTIONED:

Con Koutsikas is a Key Note Speaker, Public Speaking and Communications expert, coach and mentor running corporate and public group workshops and one on one coaching.

Con is also host of his podcast, ‘A Cuppa with The Con Versationalist’

Con is passionate about helping businesses and individuals create deeper relationships and greater success through better speaking and communication skills.

CONNECT WITH CON KOUTSIKAS
https://www.conkoutsikas.com/
Connect with Con on LinkedIn
Connect with Con on Instagram and Facebook
Connect with Con on Twitter

CONNECT WITH SAMANTHA RILEY
Connect with me on Instagram and Facebook
Connect with me on LinkedIn

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Con is an accomplished and articulate speaker, trainer and certified coach who is passionate about helping businesses and individuals create greater success by teaching speaking and communication skills. These skills contribute to improvement and better outcomes in every area of business, such as sales, customer service and controlling fear and anxiety around presenting your thoughts and ideas (standing up and speaking out).

With over 30 years of practical commercial experience from business ownership and senior management roles, which included more than 25 years of high-level sales expertise and combined with his years of corporate training and coaching, Con delivers programs well supported by theory, ‘the what and why’ but steeped with direct practical applications, ‘the how’.

Con is also a Distinguished Toastmaster (DTM), the highest individual award bestowed on members of Toastmasters International, keynote speaker and the host of his popular podcast, ‘A Cuppa with the Con Versationalist’

Now, more than ever, speaking IS the new competitive advantage. How we communicate with our customers, staff, colleagues, stake holders’ potential employers and our friends and family is vital, indeed, improved communication skills will positively impact every area of your life.

Con’s fun and interactive programs have helped hundreds of people become more confident and effective speakers and communicators by taking a holistic approach, dealing with the 4 key pillars of communication which are present in every human interaction, mind, body, voice and language and provide practical strategies and tools which participants can implement immediately.

TRANSCRIPTION

Con Koutsikas Snippet (00:00):

Success is the combination of your knowledge, but also your skills to deliver that knowledge. Our anxiety comes from either a lack of knowledge or a lack of skills. If we have both, we can reduce that level of anxiety. So it’s all about preparation.

Samantha Riley Intro (00:17):

My name is Samantha Riley, and this is the podcast for experts who want to be the unapologetic leader in their industry. We’re going to share the latest business growth, marketing, and leadership strategies, as well as discussing how you can use your human design to create success in business and life. Inside and out. It’s time to take your influence, income, and impact to the level you know you’re capable of. Are you ready to make a bigger difference and scale up? This is the Influence By Design podcast.

Welcome to today’s episode of Influence by Design. I’m your host for today Samantha Riley and super excited to be interviewing a concrete speakers who is a keynote speaker, a public speaking and communications expert. And he’s also the host of the podcast a cuppa with the conversationalist, which I was on just a couple of months back talking about thought leadership, we had a great conversation. But I’ve invited Con today to talk to us about public speaking, which is one of the most important things if you want to build your authority and position yourself as the trusted thought leader people turn to. So welcome to the show Con.

Con (01:27):

Thanks very much, Sam. Absolute pleasure to be here. It’s been a role reversal from last time,

Samantha (01:32):

isn’t it? Just as he was funny when he said, Oh, I feel a bit odd. Now, I’m not the one that’s asking the questions.

Con (01:38):

I’m not running the show here.

Samantha (01:41):

No, no, you have to do what I say now. Only joking, I’m really looking forward to our conversation, talking about public speaking because I know that as coaches as experts, as course creators, that speaking is one of the best ways to grow our business through our having the platform building our authority, but also building our audience, which means that it gives us a bigger platform to be able to build our influence. Why don’t you start off by sharing a little bit about how you got to be doing what you do today. Because I know, like myself, you’ve also got a very windy journey to how you’ve got to what you’re doing.

Con (02:22):

Yes, indeed, wind is probably an understatement, Sam, I guess just for a bit of context, I was in the commercial furniture industry for probably 25 plus years running my own business. And about eight, nine years ago, life just wasn’t ticking along the way that it should have. Business was not good. Coming off the back of a really toxic relationship. And my confidence was absolutely shot. Like I was always a confident person. And I was just shocked. I couldn’t talk to people. And I was listening to a audio recording from Zig Ziglar. And for those of you that may or may not know Zig famous American motivational speaker, and definitely one of the trendsetters in that field. And he said one of the best ways that you can build your confidence and your self esteem is to learn to speak in public. And he actually mentioned Toastmasters by name.

So of course, as soon as I’ve finished listening, con on the keyboard, Google’s Toastmasters gets onto a club here in Adelaide. And next minute, I’m invited to a meeting. And as I’m walking down there, I’m that you know how we have these fighting conversations going on. And our club is downstairs and I’ve walked downstairs and I’m going no, no, no, I can’t get out of here. Go Go, go, go, go. Walk back up the stairs. Can’t you got to do this. It’s good for you walk back down. Get out of here.

This is dangerous. Walk back up. And this happened probably three, four or five times and in the end. Somebody heard me going down the stairs sprung. So there was nowhere else to go. And I joined Toastmasters. And I didn’t join because I wanted to learn to speak in public. I just wanted to become me again. I wanted to get my mojo back. And after probably a couple of years, I was getting some really positive feedback. Geez, come on. You’re really good at this. But confidence wasn’t great where it should get.

So the fighting was still going on. Long story short, about four years ago, a gentleman rang me up and said, Come What are you doing? I need somebody to help me co facilitate a program. I’m going yet but side nothing else to do. And he said Well, I’m gonna pay you. I’m going. Okay. How long has this been going on for?

Samantha (04:52):

Oh, you actually get paid for this stuff?

Con (04:53):

Oh, yeah. And the rest, as I say is history. And I just I’m passionate about it. I love it. I love helping people as I know you do and, and it’s unbelievable how it impacts how can impact people’s lives in a positive. And not just about standing on stage, but the conversations that they have in not only their professional life, but their relationships.

Samantha (05:17):

I love this. And you and I have got a very similar story in that I started speaking when I separated from my husband of 20 years as well. Because at the time, I had no confidence, all the things that you were saying, no confidence, I didn’t know who I was. And at the time, I was like, the only way that I can get out of this because I was so fearful of life was what can I do to make me realize that there’s something you know, like, what is it that I fear the most, so I can like, attack that and then move forward. And at the time for me it was public speaking. And that’s how I actually segwayed into the coaching industry was that I went and did a public speaking course.

And I know that this is something that you talk about a lot for me. I was more afraid than speaking in public than I was of dying. And I know that this is a normal thing for people. And you would come up against that all the time. I didn’t go up and down stairs. But I can tell you the day before my course started, I was physically ill, I was so scared. And the whole time I did this course I can just my hands were sweaty the whole time. I’ve since been told that no one else picked that up. I covered it up very well. But at the time, I was like what am I doing, and now I actually love it. Now I love it.

(06:33):

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Samantha (07:00):

So there’s probably people that are listening that are like you or me and are really fearful of speaking in public. How can people start to reframe the fear? Because I think it’s not about pushing it away, right?

Con (07:18):

It’s no you can’t it’s fear exists. And I read a beautiful meme. Not long ago that said courage. She cannot exist without fear. So we need to confront whatever the fear is and deal with it. But what was really interesting, an article I read recently, a study done in America in 2020 by the John Hopkins University, they found 77% of the population acknowledged some form of fear or level of anxiety of those impacted directly impacted wages and promotions by 10 to 15%, respectively.

70% of the workforce acknowledge the value in having speaking and communication skills. But this is the number that blew me away only 8% sought professional help. So you’ve got 70% of the workforce says, hey, it’s really good for my career, it’s going to help me move forward.

Yet only 8% of them get any professional help and professional help not necessarily, you know, a one on one coaching program with somebody like myself, but even going to Toastmasters. But in answer to your question, what can they do? Reframing as you know, is one of the greatest strategies.

Because at the end of the day, our body physiologically responds the same way to fear or excitement, you know, the sweaty palms increase heart rate, shortness of breath. And so rather than having the conversation, God, I’m terrified, I’m scared. I’m going to mess this up on you know, I don’t want to do it. It’s really about I’m excited to do this. I’m really appreciative of this opportunity to share my knowledge. It makes the world of difference. And I always say to people, any elite sportsmen, you know, Michael Jordan, in the basketball field, any of the AFL stars, are they nervous when they go out there? Absolutely, they are. Butterflies are gone.

But it’s all about what’s between the ears. You know, and it’s just it’s reframe it and get it in the right frame of mind. And breathe.

Samantha (09:21):

I found that one of the biggest reframes I had to do was, it’s not about me. So when I first started speaking, I would think I’m scared that I’m going to say the wrong word or that I’m going to start or I’m going to do something really stupid with my hands or insert 1000 ridiculous things that used to go through my head because I don’t think there’s anything that I didn’t think that was ridiculous.

I think I covered them all. And it took a little bit to realize actually, it’s not about me at all, like people generally don’t want to be in a room and not want to see you succeed or they don’t want to be They’re not have a great experience. So by making it all about yourself, you know, you’re robbing your audience of a great experience.

Con (10:10):

Absolutely you are. And you’re right. It’s not about you as the speaker. And one of the things that I say to people in my workshops is, how many of you by show of hands woke up this morning and thought, God, I’m gonna listen to this concrete because bloke, and I hope he stinks.

I hope I waste my time, I hope I’ve wasted my money. And of course, they’re looking at you like, what are you talking about? I’m going, guys, people come to listen to you or to hear you. Because they’ve invested time and or money? Of course, they want to get something out of it. They want you to succeed. Absolutely, they do. And citizen people yesterday, guys, you are as a general rule, we are much better speakers than we give ourselves credit for.

Because we’re having this conflicting conversation all the time. And the minute you reframe it, as you said about it’s not about me, it’s about the value and the knowledge and the expertise that I can share with the audience. But also, I’m excited to do this, how exciting is it that I get an opportunity to teach people and that they want to learn?

Samantha (11:21):

I love that. So let’s talk more about how to prepare to actually get in the room. Because I think it’s one thing to say let’s reframe the fear, have some positive self talk. But there are still things that we should be doing to ensure that we’re showing up and doing the best job that we can, and not just leaving it to chance, because that’s not what the great speakers do. And I think, you know, being able to look at the people that are successful that lead the way, you know, success does leave clues, what are they doing? So what are some of the things that we can do to prepare to really show up and be a great speaker?

Con (12:02):

Look, there’s so many things, and it depends on the situation in terms of you know, are you speaking to a big audience? Are you just running a workshop? What is it but the number one thing is preparation? Be prepared with what you’re going to talk about? That’s the first thing and practice. Know your audience? Who are you speaking to? You know, is the language in your presentation? Is it pitched towards that audience? Do you need a microphone? Every time I’m going to speak every time I’m going to speak, I go to the venue. And I check out how it’s set up? Is there a microphone? Does the microphone work? You know, it’s all about preparation.

And of course, if your life depends on this, if this is your moment in the sun, let’s say get some coaching, get a little bit of training prior to. Because for me, what I say to people is success is the combination of your knowledge, but also your skills to deliver that knowledge. So our anxiety comes from either a lack of knowledge, or a lack of skills. If we have both, we can reduce that level of anxiety. So it’s all about preparation.

Samantha (13:17):

I love that you’ve brought up the environment that we’re speaking in, because I don’t hear very many people speak about this. And as a dancer, I know the importance of this so much. I know one day we turned up to a venue was actually in Adelaide, and the venue was so excited. They’re like we’ve had a cancellation in this amazing room, we’ve upgraded you. And I was bit excited until I walked into the room, which was about five times the size, which had really high ceilings, which had, the room wasn’t like a square or rectangle is a really odd shape.

And I just walked in and went there is no way I can control what’s happening in this room. Because there’s too much happening. And I said, I really, really am super grateful that you’ve done this. But please have our old room back. Because you need to be aware of how the energy flows when you are speaking in person. I know that one time I walked into a room and I’m always one for showing up early. And I was speaking just after lunch. We all know how awesome it is to speak to be the first speaker after lunch. Exciting.

But you know, we got to do it, you do it. I’m actually really grateful that I was on this particular day because I walked into the room I was around 100 seats, but the walkway was straight down the middle, which has you know, as a speaker, the energy just expels straight down the middle. So what we did right, you know, 10 minutes before was closed that gap and made two walkways on either side so that I wasn’t releasing the energy.

So that’s how important that is to understand the environment to make sure that you are in control as the speaker because here’s the thing when you’re not prepared and I’d love you to speak more into the Sometimes you can be really prepared and practice his speech and know exactly what you’re talking about.

But some of those things can feel like they’re out of your control. And it can actually make or break you. So if I had have gone and spoken with the, you know, the gap straight down the center, and my energy just flowed straight out, there could have been 100 People walking out going, Oh, Sam wasn’t a very good speaker. Like there was just, it was flat.

So can you talk more into some of those other things? Because I think this is a really, really important conversation.

Con (15:29):

Oh, it’s huge. And, again, people, I did an MC job not long ago. And I said to them at the beginning, I couldn’t get to the venue. Where have we got a microphone, but you know, all the questions that I normally ask, I said, yeah, all tick, tick, tick, tick, tick.

And it was a book launch. But a really important event for this lady. And it turns out, it’s a shared space at a really rowdy venue. And the microphone was one of those handheld mics with the speaker that’s like a little suitcase, a little portable ones. And nobody could hear a word. Nobody know. And it was just, I felt bad for her. But hey, not a lot I could do. And so getting to the venue is crucial.

He said seating and whatever. Again, a little story, a major university here in Adelaide, they were doing an event I happened to be there, the lady speaking, long room, couple of 100 people in their microphone, didn’t check, the microphone wasn’t working. Nobody could hear. And as a consequence, she’s talking for half a minute, not even. And you could hear people starting to speak. And the volume in the room got up higher and higher and higher. And in the end, nobody knew what she was saying. Just completely lost.

So in terms of preparation, going to the venue is absolutely crucial. Absolutely crucial. Know how it’s going to be set up seating wise. Does the microphone work? You know, I can speak to 150 people, because I’ve got a, you know, fairly powerful voice. But for ladies who don’t find out if you need a mic, go and get one. Does your PowerPoint work? You know, ask the venue do they have a projector is? What do you need to provide anything? What do you need?

Samantha (17:25):

You know, what cables? Do I need to bring? What adapters want to bring?

Con (17:27):

What cables? Exactly? And what I say is what’s the worst thing that can happen? Think about what’s the worst thing that can happen and have a plan before?

Samantha (17:37):

What does that plan B look like? Or what could it look like? Okay, because I know what I do. But I’d love to hear it from you.

Con (17:43):

Right, If you forget USB home, make sure you’ve uploaded your presentation, either OneDrive or one of those shared facilities. So you’ve got access to your PowerPoint. And that’s happened to me. Yes, we’ve got a laptop, fantastic. Bring your laptop as well. And make sure you’ve got the appropriate cables that you need. Or you worried that you’re going to trip? Have a line ready? Oh, good. Look at this, make a joke out of it. Like, whatever the worst thing is, have you forgotten your notes? Have a spare set on your email, send them to you. There’s lots of things that we can do.

But just think about what the worst thing that can happen. And just plan for it. And the reality is it never happens. It very rarely happens. So preparation is absolutely. I just can’t stress the importance of preparation.

Samantha (18:31):

Absolutely. Visualization is something that you talk a lot about as well. And visualization is something that, again, this is what the elite athletes do. This is what actors actresses I know in dance, we used to visualize a lot. How can we implement visualization into our speaking practice, I guess,

Con (18:52):

I always tell a story. An American University recently did a study they got basket 60 basketball players, and they split them up in three groups. 20 practice their shooting 20 did nothing but visualize their shooting. And 20 did neither the group that practiced improved by 24%.

The group that did nothing didn’t improve, obviously, the group that did nothing but visualization improved by 23%. Now, what people don’t understand is that we can’t tell the difference between an imaginary event and a real event. You know, so when we’re creating this thing in our mind, we creating new neural pathways to get us like in the motion.

So you can’t imagine a golfer lining up to have a championship partners going. Now I’m gonna see myself missing this. It just doesn’t happen. So you need to have a positive image of yourself being successful is see raucous applause. See people giving you a standing ovation, just emphasize it, get that emotion going.

Because it’s such a powerful tool, you know, and on the reverse if you don’t do that, and you’re seeing these catastrophes where people are throwing tomatoes at you, you know, it creates self talk, which we know, it becomes like the hamster wheel, you know, your self talk, you know that your opinions of yourself your actions, and ultimately reinforces your self talk, and it just goes round and round. You know, so if you see yourself stuffing it up, and then when you do stuff it up, you guys see, I told you, I was no good. Yeah, confirmation bias, confirmation bias, he goes, so visualization is just so underrated. So underrated, but so important. And not just in speaking, but again, as you know, in pretty much every aspect of your life.

Samantha (20:50):

Totally. Do you practice your talks, because there’s a lot of people I speak to this, I just like to go with the flow. And I’m always a little bit wary of total, I’m going to go with the flow. But I’d love your take on this.

Con (21:08):

It depends. Now, people aren’t gonna want to hear this.

Samantha (21:15):

But perfect, this is perfect.

Con (21:17):

I’m one of these people that can if you give me a topic, I can do an hour keynote, with very little preparation. You know, I’ve got a Toastmasters. And, you know, we had competitions recently, people practice for weeks on end, on thinking of a topic driving there. And speaking when I get there, ladies and gentlemen, don’t do what Con does, right?

Be prepared, if you’re just going to speak off the cuff to a small group. Again, your preparation needs to be proportional to the importance of the event, if you’re going to present in front of your board, and it’s life and death, prepare, write it out, practice it time.

But timing is something that, again, is everything. And people are wise time important. Well, if they want you to speak for 15 minutes, and they’ve paid you for 15 minutes, and you speak for five, they’re going to feel ripped off. And if you speak for 25, they’re going to be going, you know, off. Yep.

You know, so preparation is relative to the importance of the event. And I can’t emphasize enough Don’t be like Con, even though when I do my workshops, my content is always prepared and practiced. And my keynote is always rehearsed and practiced. But I don’t read.

So here’s a tip for the listeners. If you’re going to give a speech, rather than reading it verbatim, I have notes on the lectern next to you, which you can refer to, which are acting as a prompt. For example, con wants to talk about statistics at the John Hopkins University. So my prompt is going to say John Hopkins stats. Great. So I know that and when I finish that, I’m going to cast my eyes over to the next note, which is, whatever it is, and that’s prompting me to speak.

So it’s natural, there’s a big difference between reading and speaking, because eye contact is crucial. Or, as I like to call it eye connection. So we need to make a connection with the audience. And you can’t do that when you’re looking down reading a piece of paper.

Samantha (23:33):

I think I really liked the way they explained that. And I wanted to go a little bit deeper into it. Because I think that depending on sort of what you’re thinking about at the time, or your perception could take any of those out of context. So what I’m hearing you say is that you do need to prepare, so if you’re giving a keynote or something important, so that you make sure that you’re hitting all of the really important aspects.

So you can’t, or you shouldn’t just go off the cuffs in case you missed some of those. However, at the same time, what you’re doing is flowing freely between those. So you have something that sounds not forced not read, not, you know, in air quotes, weird, something that you know, so you’re not completely making it up, but you’re not completely going word for word I that you’re sitting somewhere in the middle.

Con (24:17):

People need to relate to you, you need to be relatable. And we talk about vulnerability, and there’s no relatability to somebody who’s just reading off a piece of paper. People need to, you know, they say body language is 55% You know how you sound is 38 and what you say is 7% 55% important, they need to see you you know and your actions need to be congruent with what you’re saying.

And they can’t do that when your head down reading on a piece of paper. And as you make a good point, if you’re presenting on a really important occasion, and you’ve got key points that you absolutely have to hit.

Then having those notes. As I said a four piece of paper being bold, right? font, you can’t miss them, and good spacing. So and this, you know, people go oh, but I looked at my notes, there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s you make your point. And then pausing is crucial. We want the audience to get an opportunity to actually process what you’ve said. Absolutely, yeah, right, you can just go right over. Alright.

So when you finish a point, you looking over to the lectern to have a look at what your next key point that you need to make is, is beneficial not only for you, but for the audience.

Samantha (25:37):

Love that. Now, obviously, we’re talking a lot about in person, but I believe that speaking isn’t just about in person, there’s so many other ways that we can do speaking, you know, we can, I mean, I know that you’ve had a pretty good run in Adelaide, you haven’t really, you know, you’ve been affected too much by the pandemic, there’s some places in the world that have been in lockdown for, you know, well over a year.

And certainly, we’re heading in at the time of recording, we’re heading into 100 days in lockdown in a row. So a lot of us have had to pivot and really upgrade our skills in different areas.

Because things like podcasting, virtual speaking all of those, how much have you had to? Or do you suggest people train to be able to speak on these different platforms? Like, once you’re speaking in person, how many different skills do we need to bring into it to be able to speak on these different platforms?

Con (26:37):

When you’re speaking, on Zoom, the basic skill sets are the same. You need to your body language needs to be good, you still need to look like a human being, even though people can’t see you from the waist down. Unless, of course you’re standing up. You still need to be engaging all the same rules, apply the differences, you obviously need to understand the technical side of the medium to make sure that you’re operating effectively and efficiently.

Things like your background, Now mine’s white, the curtains are on their way. You’ve got a beautiful background there your bookcase, how many times like, particularly when the pandemic started, and everything was on Zoom? People like in their bedrooms, the beds not made. And it’s a bit like that KFC ad, you know, where the lady, she says, I’m sorry, I’m late to the meeting and the young lead from accounts that she’s having some fun with. pops his head up and they go, Oh, Mike from accounts, and she goes, Oh, anybody say KFC.

So we need to be wary of the background just because you’re on a medium, it doesn’t mean they can’t see you or see what’s behind you. So, you know, we need to be aware that our background is still important, we still need to present Well, we still need to have the basic principles of speaking. You know, so none of that changes. In fact, it’s a common question I get, you know, we do a lot of zoom calls, they say so, you know, how can we apply this? Well, exactly the same way, when you’re standing in front of a group, we have the fight or flight, we’ve got 30 seconds before or less than 30 seconds, people make a judgment call on you.

So what are you going to do to make sure that that judgment of you, as an individual is favorable for them to continue psychologically engaging with you,

Samantha (28:30):

I do find speaking to a zoom group a little more challenging than in the room, because I don’t have that instant feedback. And I don’t have that palpable energy that’s right there. I feel that it’s almost like you do have to turn it up just a little bit more to try and get that same energy happening.

But I think it’s really important to think, Oh, well, you know, were in a, you know, in lockdown, or what, you know, there is no local events where we are, so don’t worry about speaking, but I really want people to understand that speaking is more just about sharing your message. And there are so many platforms and availability to do that. Exactly. It’s so important.

Con (29:12))

And not only zoom, you know, for coaches out there, and whatever your line of business is. Social media is obviously an integral part of what we do and how we do it. You know, whether you’re shooting videos, instructional videos, or whatever, you still need to have those skills still need to have those skills to, you know, connect with your audience.

Pause effectively not use every second word, um, and filler words, you know what I mean? And so on and so forth. Like, you know, you know, like, like, like really, so it’s things like that.

So you’re right, there’s so many different mediums and we need to practice and those skills that we Learn from communication speaking, are totally translatable to zoom, Facebook Lives, and so on and so forth.

Samantha (30:15):

If there’s someone listening that has been not willing or not ready, not It’s not not willing wasn’t the right word not ready to step into speaking, but know that they need to what is one of the best ways for them to start to actually start speaking in front of groups of people? I know, you know, you had mentioned that this is something that you haven’t been doing forever. So even How did you get started?

Con (30:35):

If you want it, there’s an opportunity pretty much everywhere for you to speak. And the important thing that we need to understand is that, you know, when we people say, Oh, you’re a public speaker, well, they conjure up this vision that you’re always standing on a stage speaking to, you know, 123 400 people.

But public speaking, essentially, is just another form of communication. You know, you and I are having a communicating now, that’s public speaking, how running a toolbox meeting, as they do for the traders in the morning. That’s public speaking.

I say to people, the first question I asked people in my workshops, hands up, who’s in sales? And of course, generally, nobody puts her hand up because very little sales people. And I go, well, here you go. Everyone’s in sales. Can I was selling ideas were selling this. But going back to your question, if you want to speak at your church, you can speak at your church. If you want to run a little workshop at work. At lunchtime, you can do that.

Practice with your friends. Practice with your business associates. Hey guys, I want to run a little presentation pass you can speak in front of you. join Toastmasters, I can’t speak highly enough about Toastmasters now, Toastmasters. If you’re looking to become a professional speaker, or improve your skills from zero to 100, in two months, it’s not going to happen. Toastmasters is the place where you get the opportunity to speak, every meeting we make twice a month. And you’ll speak in a different role, whether you’re an evaluator, whether you’re a speaker, whether whatever, you’ll get an opportunity to speak. So there’s a multitude of opportunities for people to speak if they want to do so.

Samantha (32:23):

Love it. I asked that because I think that some people and I’ve seen it happen hold themselves back thinking that they need to go straight for like the big, I want to be get the big, you know, $10,000 paid gig you want to be you know, I’ve got this fancy keynote in my head. And it’s just like, well, maybe just start off at a couple of networking events or create your own little networking group, we start to speak to people, because things are not going to go the way you think at the beginning. And I know for me, I was so glad that I was speaking to smaller groups to start with, because he helped me to go, um, that didn’t quite go the way I planned to go. I’ll pay attention and make that a little bit different next time.

Con (33:05):

I reckon there’s three speeches, there’s the one you want it to give the one you actually gave, and then the one you thought of after you’d finished?

Samantha (33:15):

Oh, and it’s me number three, every time. Oh, Con, this has been great. Where can people go to learn more about you and what you do?

Con (32:25):

Best please visit my website, which is conkoutsikas.com. I’ve got some downloadable resources, eliminate your fear of public speaking, I’ve got a little quiz on there. Right yourself, which is a handy little tool. And it’ll give you a score, which will rate you where you sit as a speaker. And that’s quite a valuable tool. I’ve got probably over two hours worth of free instructional videos that I’ve done. By all means some from my early days.

So you know, they’re probably not what they are now. But this stacks, loads of information, low regard, my courses, my coaching. And of course, my always episodes of my podcasts are there. So visit my website, concretes cars.com, that’d be the best place to go.

Samantha (34:11):

And of course, we’ll pop those links in the show notes, as always over at Smith rally dot global forward slash podcast so that you can get the links. No matter what it is that you’re doing, I thoroughly recommend that you do and I’d love to give to put a challenge out there that if you haven’t done any public speaking at all to plan something in the next month where you can speak to a few people because it is such a brilliant way like I said at the beginning to build your authority position, your thought leadership and to build trust with the people that you are around and to really grow your influence. It’s so important. So thanks Con, for sharing everything that you have today. It’s been such a pleasure chatting with you.

Con (34:53):

It’s been an absolute pleasure. Thank you very much for having me, Sam.

Samantha Outro (34:57):

Thanks for joining me for this episode of the Influence By Design podcast. If you want more head over to influencebydesignpodcast.com for the show notes and links to today’s gifts and sponsors. And if you’re looking to connect with other experts who are growing and scaling their business to join us in the coaches, thought leaders, and changemakers community on Facebook, the links are waiting for you over at influencebydesignpodcast.com

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